Wandering into an archive you've never been to is kind of like starting a new job. You don't know your way around, how things are done, or what the institutional culture is like. And you have about 20 minutes to figure that all out so that you can get started calling up objects you need to look at. Sometimes, finding out exactly what it is you want to see is the hardest part. With the millions of papers, books, diaries, journals, sketchbooks, and more that are stored in archives, finding the useful pieces can be a tiring search.
Fortunately, between doing Internet searches in advance and getting advice from librarians, I was able to get what I needed quickly. And while I was working 9 to 5 at my computer in a quiet room, it was much more satisfying than going to a conventional workplace. My favorite parts of working were always the times when I got to do research, so this exactly what I went back to school to do. I was touching paper people in the nineteenth century had touched, reading what they had written, discovering nuggets that were useful for my project.
My second day doing research, a single piece of paper stopped me cold and reminded me that while I might be enjoying myself, I was looking at real people and sometimes harsh truths. Sandwiched between some personal letters, I found the bill of sale for a slave. I'm sure there are thousands of these, but I had never held one in my hands before. What I found most chilling was the line that said that this man would be the buyer's property "forever." That's not something you'd normally need to emphasize when you sell something, but this was the sale of a person.
I felt vaguely queasy the rest of the day after that find. No matter how much you read about history, holding a tiny piece of it in your own hands will always bring it home. Was going to the archives a business or a pleasure trip? A bit of both--plus a reality check.
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