On ice cream and intellect

I have a minor obsession with ice cream. Growing up, I ate mint chocolate chip ice cream at home every night and I still keep about 4 cartons of ice cream in my freezer at all times. I've discovered the wonders of Philadelphia's ice cream parlors and gelaterias, particularly Franklin Fountain, Scoop DeVille, and Capogiro. Little did I know that my ice cream eating habit was offensive.

I was surprised to learn, from Bush's bioethics advisor Leon R. Kass, that eating ice cream cones is wrong because of more than just the high fat and sugar content. I am in fact committing an etiquette faux pas whenever I consume an ice cream cone. According to Kass, "licking an ice cream cone" is the worst of many "uncivilized forms of eating" because it is "a catlike activity that has been made acceptable in informal America but that still offends those who know eating in public is offensive."

Lest you think Kass is some undereducated lunatic, it's important to note that this guy has an M.D. from Chicago and a Ph.D. from Harvard. This proves some long-standing assumptions of mine: a) Getting a Ph.D. does not require logical reasoning abilities, b) Being well-educated does not make you smart, and c) If you meet somebody who dislikes ice cream, steer clear.

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For your amusement...some more quotes from Kass. He hates feminists even more than ice cream lickers!